The only option I know of that works is making the filters pop and swap, as shown in the video here -- it's not an easy thing to learn, and is certainly a workaround. The video shows changing filters or legends based on a sheet, but I believe the same could be applied when using a parameter to change values: Sheet Swap and Pop in Tableau on Vimeo
I'm sure you've already tried using the "Only Relevant Values" setting on the filter -- that will only set the values for the filter, rather than showing/hiding actual filters based on your selection.
Best of luck - if nothing works, it may be a good time to rethink the approach and find another way to visualize your data. Happy analyzing!